Out of all the relationship guides we’ve reviewed over the years, I can’t think of one that has been quite as popular James Bauer’s “His Secret Obsession”.
Seriously, I’ve read countless dating/relationship books for women since I started this little website.
And to be completely honest, most of them don’t bring too many new, helpful concepts to the table…
Sure…if you are brand new to this kind of information you might find something of interest, but generally speaking most of these guides will teach you the same basic information, worded differently…
So when I first started going through His Secret Obsession, my expectations weren’t all that high.
That being said, as I got into it I quickly became intrigued by James’ unique approach and his concept of the “hero instinct.”
So today, I’m excited to share my comprehensive review of this book.
>> Click Here to skip right to the Official His Secret Obsession Website…
Does His Secret Obsession live up to the hype?
Is the hero instinct a legitimate research backed concept?
Is the book really worth your time and money?
Let’s explore these questions together!
What is His Secret Obsession?
His Secret Obsession is a 217-page relationship guide written by James Bauer. The book is designed to help women build long-term, committed relationships with the men they love by tapping into what Bauer has coined as their “hero instinct”.
The hero instinct is a psychological concept that suggests that men have an innate, universal desire to be needed and to cultivate a life filled with purpose by being heros to the women in their lives.
In addition to the main book, you also receive a workbook as well as several trainings which provide practical strategies for triggering this instinct in men. The book includes specific words, phrases, and text messages that can be adapted to different situations, aiming to make men fall deeply in love by making them feel like everyday heroes.
Who is James Bauer?
James Bauer is a bestselling author and renowned relationship coach. He began his career as a trained psychologist before transitioning to relationship coaching. According to his website Bauer has helped thousands of men and women strengthen their relationships over the past 12 years.
Personally, I like the way he teaches. He doesn’t dumb down his content, or use a lot of vocabulary words unnecessarily, which makes his program that much easier to process.
I’d also say that based on the concepts he’s teaching and the way he explains them – that he has a profoundly deep understanding of male psychology. This, coupled with his practical experience coaching women is apparently what led him to develop his concept of the hero instinct.
Is His Secret Obsession Worth It?
I’ve read a ton of dating and relationship advice books, so I have a high standard for what I consider valuable.
His Secret Obsession quickly resonated with me because it introduced fresh ideas and actionable strategies derived from a practical understanding of male psychology.
So if you’re struggling with commitment issues or finding it difficult to keep your man engaged, then this book offers some incredibly insightful and effective advice.
Who is His Secret Obsession For?
His Secret Obsession is for women who want to understand what truly motivates men in relationships on a deep level. It’s particularly beneficial for:
- Women who want to transition a friendship into a romantic relationship.
- Women looking to move from casual dating to a committed relationship.
- Women whose partners seem emotionally distant, uninterested, or are pulling away.
- Women trying to reconnect with an ex.
Who Should & Shouldn’t Read It?
His Secret Obsession isn’t for everyone.
If you’re not willing to put in the effort and follow through on the book’s strategies, it may not be beneficial.
Additionally, this book is tailored specifically for women interested in committed relationships with men, and may not be as useful for women looking for casual relationships or those who identify as lesbian.
Inside the Book: Understanding the Hero Instinct
His Secret Obsession is divided into three main parts:
Understanding the Hero Instinct: This section explains the hero instinct in detail and how it impacts men’s behavior in relationships.
Triggering the Hero Instinct: Here, Bauer reveals practical strategies to activate this instinct, including specific words, phrases, and actions.
Text Message Formulas: The book concludes with text message formulas that you can start using immediately to engage your man.
The book contains 17 modules that delve into the psychology of the hero instinct, providing specific tips and strategies to trigger it. Bauer offers exact phrases and requests that you can use to make your man feel essential and appreciated.
Signals and How to Use Them
One of the most important parts of this book are the various “signals” that you get to use with your man, such as:
The “I owe you” signal.
The “private island” signal.
The “X-ray question.”
The “ex-back” signal.
The “glimpse” phrase.
The “damsel in distress” signal.
The “silent action” signals.
The “fascination” signal.
You’ll also learn what Bauer calls the secret “currency” of happy relationships.
These signals use psychological principles to create emotional attachment and shift his mindset from “I” to “we.” They are subtle and can be easily incorporated into conversations without your man realizing there’s a psychological basis behind them.
The Best Part: Rachel’s 12-Word Text
One of the most compelling parts of the book is the story of Rachel. Rachel was a favorite client of James’ who struggled with her relationship. She didn’t want to appear clingy, so she stepped back, but her boyfriend stopped reaching out. In desperation, she sought Bauer’s help.
James gave her this simple 12-word text message to send to her boyfriend, which triggered his hero instinct and reignited his interest. This story exemplifies how the strategies in the book can work in real-life situations.
The Pros of His Secret Obsession
Here are some of the aspects I liked most about His Secret Obsession:
Comprehensive Guide: It’s over 200 pages before you get to the additional resources and it covers pretty much everything that you might need to know about building a successful, happy, lasting relationship.
Practical Advice: Bauer provides clear and actionable strategies, avoiding vague or theoretical advice.
Research-Based Methods: The book’s concepts are supported by psychological research, making them credible and effective.
Hero Instinct Concept: Understanding and leveraging the hero instinct can be an absolute game-changer in how you approach your relationship.
Immediate Access: As an eBook, you can start reading and implementing the advice right away.
The Cons of His Secret Obsession
Despite its many strengths, there are a few downsides to the book:
Layout: The organization of the book can be a bit confusing, requiring you to read it in its entirety to fully understand the concepts.
Detail on Theories: Some psychological theories are not explained in great detail, which might leave some readers wanting more in-depth explanations.
Format: The book is only available as an eBook or audiobook, which might not appeal to those who prefer physical books.
Price: At $47, it is more expensive than most eBooks. However, considering the depth and practical nature of the content, it could be seen as a worthwhile investment.
The Hero Instinct: Is It A Legit Concept?
Personally, I find the hero instinct to be a compelling explanation of male behavior in relationships. Men have a deep-seated desire to feel needed and to make a meaningful impact on their partner’s life. Bauer’s approach taps into this instinct in a way that is respectful and authentic.
Reflecting on my own experiences and the relationships of those around me, I see a lot of truth in Bauer’s ideas. Men often thrive when they feel like they are making a positive difference in their partner’s life. This concept is not about manipulation but about understanding and responding to natural human instincts.
Alternatives to His Secret Obsession
While His Secret Obsession is a standout relationship guide, there are a few alternatives that might also be worth considering:
Text Chemistry by Amy North: This program focuses on using text messages to capture a man’s interest. It’s a modern and practical approach to maintaining a long-distance relationship or keeping a man engaged through digital communication.
The Devotion System by Amy North: This program is divided into three parts: addressing personal insecurities, understanding men, and building a strong relationship. It’s more comprehensive in terms of personal development and understanding male psychology.
Where To Buy His Secret Obsession
His Secret Obsession is sold exclusively via Jame’s Bauer’s Official Website Here.
If you go to Amazon, they have other books by the same title, but they are in fact by other authors who are attempting to capitalize on the popularity of James’ book! Shady.
We recommend only purchasing directly through the links on this page to ensure that you get a genuine copy of His Secret Obsession. Also, buying through the links on this page guarantee you will get the lowest price available, access to all bonus material, and that you are eligible for his complete 100% full money back guarantee.
James will also has other products available that are only accessible to his customers, so if you are looking to go really deep into this stuff, you can, and in fact I highly recommend all of his products.
The product retails for $197 but is currently available at a 76% discount on the Official Website for $47 and includes all bonuses.
This link will beupdated regularly to ensure access aty the lowest possible price available.
Click Here to Access His Secret Obsession & All Bonuses Now!
The Verdict: Should You Read It?
After thoroughly reading and reflecting on His Secret Obsession, I can confidently say it’s absolutely worth the investment.
James Bauer delivers a thought-provoking and highly practical guide that can transform your approach to relationships.
The insights into male psychology and the practical strategies provided are invaluable.
If you’re struggling to get a man to commit or want to enhance your relationship, His Secret Obsession may be the secret weapon you need. It’s not just another dating book; it’s a comprehensive manual that you can refer to throughout your relationship journey.
In conclusion, His Secret Obsession is a must-read for any woman looking to deepen her understanding of men and build a lasting, fulfilling relationship. With its practical advice and research-backed methods, it stands out as one of the best relationship guides available today.